Confused

Alright, so I totally found out this weekend that my sister got a 7500 dollar a year scholarship. :O I only get 2000 a year. I'm not as angry as I was, but I'm still WAY upset. It wouldn't bug me, except I applied about 2-4 months before she did. (I was done by December, she started at like the end of February.) I had decided my major at the beginning of Senior year, and she hadn't chosen it, and I still doubt that she knows what she wants to do for real. 

I found out, and I couldn't stop crying. (I know, it's pathetic that a college student would cry over something like that.) Well, add in the fact I am naturally emotional, and I am stressed. So that was pretty much my Saturday night. 

Plus I have no idea how I feel about the guy I like, who is currently serving a mission. I still like him, a lot, but I don't know what the Lord wants me to do. Again, add in the fact I worked on a powerpoint by myself that's due this Friday. And I don't trust my group to get anything done. *sigh* I'm beginning to think that I'm not cut out for college. =/

On a more positive note, I'll probably be in the College of Education this time next year, and I finally got up the nerve to ask this teacher I volunteer with for a letter of recommendation. I know a week isn't enough time, but at least I asked before it was like the day before. And it was actually just under a week and a half, but I still feel bad about that. =/ 

Anyways, I'm babbling on. I love my sister, and it's not that I blame her for the whole scholarship thing, it's just that I'm really hating ASU right now. >:( Anyways, I should get going off to bed so I can finish my English paper proposal that's due tomorrow. It's really sad, but I have to take things one step at a time. =/  Just do the homework that's due tomorrow. =/ I know that's not how to live, but If I don't, then I doubt anything will get done. *Sigh* I want to go back to being a kid.