But before I start my little "friend" rant, I need to clarify something that I wrote in the spur of the moment, and it makes a big difference to the meaning of my last post. When I said I felt like I had no friends, I forgot to add the stipulation "my age." It seems like I have no friends my age. They're either older than me, or younger than me.
Anyways, here begins the spiel:
Friend, according to dictionary.com is:
–noun
| 1. | a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard. |
| 2. | a person who gives assistance; patron; supporter: friends of the Boston Symphony. |
| 3. | a person who is on good terms with another; a person who is not hostile: Who goes there? Friend or foe? |
| 4. | a member of the same nation, party, etc. |
| 5. | (initial capital letter ) a member of the Religious Society of Friends; a Quaker. |
Alright, that's the dictionary definition. My definition of friend is linked to the first one, but so much deeper. So, I'm going to use the words "friend" and "real friend" to clarify the two different uses I have for the word "friends".
A friend can be someone that's in my group of "friends" on facebook. In reality, most of them are acquaintances. That is more like the 3rd definition.
When I say friend, usually it's just someone that I like and am friendly with. For years, I refused to call people friends unless I knew they were a real friend. With facebook, I've become more lax, with the constant use of the word friend. So, I do have friends under that definition. I have lots and lots of friends. I have work friends, school friends, even church friends under that definition.
For the past few days, I haven't really felt the lack of friends, especially not at work. (Kudos to you ladies! You rock!) What I've felt is a lack of real friends. Real friends, to me, are the ones you do everything with. They can tell when you're down and they want to do anything they can to help. They're the ones you can do whatever and have a blast with, even just talking. And I've never had any that followed this, but I (at least used to) think that they had to be my age. I've never really had any friends like that. I've had some really good friends, but only one or two really good real friends.
I suppose this post isn't much happier than the last one, but I feel a bit happier. And I feel better having explained what I meant in my last post. I try to live one day at a time. Some days it's hard, but sometimes all anyone can do is survive and wait for the sun to come out again.
D & C 6:36 - "Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not." All I can do is trust on the Lord and know he'll help me through it.
EDIT: I was just thinking, and I do have lots of real friends. No, I don't feel like I have any real ones my age, still, but I have so many other real friends. Debbie, Mary, Patience, and so many others at work listen to me, and talk to me about tips and things for life. They're like my family away from home. And today, they said I'd become part of the family. And at church, there are a few people that I can call real friends, even though there's an age difference. Marie and Sis. Lundahl, whom I'm allowed to call Ali, but will always be Sis. Lundahl to me. XD And Theresa from my block one classes from school. Whenever I was stressed about class, she'd always give me uplifting thoughts and help me feel like I can accomplish the task at hand. And also the Chesley's, another set of grandparents I gained, treat me like I'm their own family.
I guess I just have my perspective wrong. Friends don't have to be the same age to mean just as much, if not more. What a blessing the people around us are. To any of you that read this, just think about all the people that mean something to you. You'd be surprised how many you can name that are your friends. REAL friends.
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